Friday, January 29, 2010

Sunrises and frost

It was/is bitterly cold today. I had to leave my SUV out because I work today and Pete doesn't. He did go down and start it for me when I was getting ready. I love that man.

On my way to work I got to see the sunrise. I love it when my trip to work happens at the same as the sun's trip to the sky. I love watching the red/orange ball float up and all the colors across the sky and on the horizon. There is something so peaceful and quiet and amazing about the whole thing.

This morning it made me think of this:

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her ealy leaf's a flower,
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf
So Eden sank to grief.
So daen goes down to day,
Nothing gold can stay.
~ Robert Frost

I love that poem. I have loved it since high school. And it really descibes the innocence of the sunrise and how fleeting it is. It had to be kismet that the author's last name is Frost, given the crisp air and the white on the trees.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

I'm in love...

with Apple's new release of the iPad. I'm coveting an electronic device.

And I must talk to Pete about purchasing one really really soon.

Oh Peeeeeeeeete!!!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

I have Reese's Pieces on my bedside table

and it's all that I can do not to pack myself up fm work and head home for them.

I went to see my torture, I mean phycial therapist this morning. She was all bright and cheery and wanting me to jump on that bike to get going. I told her no. And I had a nard time doing it. Silly me. Even though it's my pain and hurt, I had a hard time telling her no because my first instinct is to just do it so I don't hurt her feelings. But after learning this about myself, I have come to a place where I can tell her no.

Back to the PT. She asked me all kinds of questions about how much and where it hurt. I told her that I like to think I have a high pain tolerance due to my TMJ issues. But hold crap this leg of mine hurt. I told her that I sat & cried Friday night. She basically told me to suck it up and that it was going to hurt. (which is why I was no longer concerned about hurting her

So my leg is all deep tissue massaged and sore and angry and yelling at me to go home and put as much smelly menthol cream on as I can and lay in bed. Which brings me back to the candy on my nightstand.


Monday, January 25, 2010

Happy Birthday Grandma!

She's 85! She's seen more changes in the world than I may ever know. Wars, peace, electrontics, births, deaths... She's 85. I love that she has been such an imposrtant part of my life. She's supported me in most everything that I've done and made sure that I had her advice. She's loaned me money to buy my first car. She's let me live with her.

This is her family. All of us. She was so surprised when she walked into the pary Saturday. She asked everyone what they were doing there. When she realized they were there for her, it was almost more than she could stand. She cried. We gave her the best gift ever - the gift of family and friends.

This is Suzanne, Grandma Phyllis, Sue and Maureen. Sue is Grandma's sister in law. She's 95 herself! She's lost a lot of her sight and hearing, but still came to help celebrate Grandma's birthday. Suzanne and Maureen are her daughters and my Mom's cousins.

What a wonderful thing to see everyone there. I don't think we could have come up with a better gift for Grandma.

My Booty hurts

Like you really wanted to know that, right? Well it does. And I need to tell someone because I'm sure Pete's tired of me talking about my booty to him. So I'm telling anyone out there who wil listen.

My knee was getting so much better. It was sore and I couldn't really do stairs very well, but it was better. I went to therapy the first time and the exercises felt good. Well, really they hurt. But it was a good hurt, if you know what I mean. The second day I had a new PT. She introduced new exercises and then had to ride the two bikes for about 5 minutes a piece.

By Friday afternoon I could hardly move my leg, it hurt so much. My booty, my back, the outside of my leg, the inside of my leg, my all hurt. It hurt so much that by Friday night I sat in bed and cried. Pete asked if I wanted to go to the ER, but I just wanted it to stop hurting and not have to see a doctor. So I took some pain meds. Only they didn't really make a dent in the pain. And laying there in bed, my muscles were spasming so much. In turn I'd try and flex the muschle spasming to stop the spasm. It didn't work and I didn't get a lot of sleep.

Saturday we had my Grandma's party and I was up walking around A LOT. So by about 6pm Saturday I was in bed again, in such pain that I could have cried again. Only I didn't want to worry Pete.

Yesterday it was better. The muscles are still sore in my leg, but my back is better. My booty is still really sore. I discovered ActivOn Joint and Muscle and I use it. A lot. Liberally. All over my leg and booty. Good think the smell disapates soon after you apply it. It only lasts a couple of hours, but it makes everything feel warm, then cool.

And today it's about the same. Guess what tomorrow is? Therapy day. I'm scared....

Thursday, January 07, 2010

12 days

You know that song from Christmas? The 12 Days of Chirstmas. Anyway, I got to thinking that I could make my own 12 days. That it could be a gift. And that I could do with those days anything I wanted.

What I ended up doing was taking an area of our relationship where Pete and I were at a crossroads in. I thought about it for quite a while and came up with 12 things that I could text him or give to him to share with him. They were extreamly personal things so I'm not going to share them.

I started out the days by sending a text explaining what I was doing and why. He seemed excited. And my intention was to have tags or cards most days, but I wasn't feeling well and it ended up being all texts. If I didn't send a text early enough in the day I got a text from Pete asking where that day was. lol

It really did give us a chance to reconnect. To connect on a different level. And to talk. One day we kind of opened up to each other and had a wonderful conversation about an issue. I think it was because we were open already and because we were in the habit of really talking to each other during this time.

When the days ended Pete asked, "What now?" and I told him that we continue the idea. It doesn't have to stop for Christmas. We can make it whatever we want.

I loved this idea and I can't wait to use the 12 days of Valentines or the 12 days summer or the 12 days of just because...

Monday, January 04, 2010


A new year. I needed one of those. It's not that the last year was horrible. It's that I've felt like I'm riding a rollercoaster and I can't get off. There are ups and downs and turns so fast my head shakes. While I realize that the bad times are there to make me appreciate the good, I'd like some ok times to tide me over for a while.

In 2010 my mantra, my quote, my reason is "embrace the journey." I need to be more present in my daily life. I need to remember to enjoy the moment I'm in, instead of worrying about the ones that have past or the ones approaching me. I forget that a lot. I'm such a planner and a worrier that it's hard for me to just be present in my life. I'm usually worried about something that I did yesterday or moments ago or worse, worried about what is coming. I forget that I lose out on so much when I don't just be.

I need to remember that marriage is work. It occurs to me that it should be. Not bad work, just work. It's not all sunshine and roses once the rings are on. And like my personal mantra, I need to embrase the journey of marriage. The ups, the downs and the kisses. I need to remember that life isn't just about me. It's about two. It's about our dreams and wishes and wants and needs.

I need to remember to use what I have. Whether it's food in the pantry, money in the change jar, knowledge from my loved ones, lists I've made, friends I have. I need to use what I have. New isn't always what it's cracked up to be. I'd much prefer something used that has a story to tell than new - at least most the time.

I need to be thankful. Thankful for what I have and what is given to me. I am blessed. I am blessed by family and friends and work. I'm thankful for connections that I've made. I need to remember that it takes two to connect and two to keep connecting. Part of that is my job and I can do it.

I hope that 2010 is a good year. A year I can reflect upon with love and happiness.