Monday, June 07, 2010


No gym this morning.

When we got home yesterday I was wiped out. I helped unpack the tent-camper and set it up to dry in the garage. I went up and started all the laundry. Then I crashed. Sometimes when I decide to take a nap I think it's more about relaxing than sleep. Yesterday it was all about sleep. I slept and slept and slept for about 2.5 hours.

When I got up I was on the go again. More wash, store for dinner, grilling dinner, more wash. I had hoped to wear myself out. Only it didn't happen. I was awake until 1 or 1:30. But I got a high score in Bejeweled. (insert wry grin)

So I try again tomorrow. I figure that by tonight I'll be wiped out again and sleep will come easily. Then I can get up early tomorrow and get some gym time in.

*******this is my 8:10pm edit:
Pete and I just walked 2 miles after dinner. He actually had to slow me down. In the past it's been me slowing him down. I'm worried about him.

Sunday, June 06, 2010

I'm struggling

in more ways than one.

Firstly I promise to do better in blogging. I feel better when I blog, when I let all the stuff in my head out. When I read it back and come to different, but not necessarily better conclusions. Admittedly it's gonig to be more of a struggle. Work has blooked blogs through the server. So I can have 20 minutes of blogs a day. Part of me wants to use the 20 minutes to enter my blog. Part of me thinks that the 20 minutes I spend on there will end up logged somewhere in a log book to people using the internet for their own purpose. So my blogging will end up being the small chances I jump on at home and from the application on my iPhone.

Secondly I'm struggling with the weight thing. I have pretty well maintained for the last 45 days despite the not working out and not eating as well as I was before. I knew it would be hard. I knew that it would be a struggle. But I'm wondering if I didn't underestimate how much.

I'm not nearly as motivated to exercise. Not nearly. I think 6-7 days a week is likely not something that I can maintain. I think that I can do 4-5 days a week though. Exercising in the morning before work is about the only time that I can fit it in. So it's my new goal for June. I figure that setting up a tent and taking it down and walking around at campouts on the weekend will count for something. This coming weekend I'll try bringing workout clothes and walk in the moring while the guys are at breakfast in the moring and then get a shower in.

I also need to figure out what exactly is causing me to have sciatic issues on my left side. My back is sore today, but It could be partly from the hard matress in the camper. I'm hoping that asteady walking this week will work that out and I'll be able to get it figured out.

Food. What I loaded thing. I need it, but I want it too much. I do ok during the week. I'm not perfect and I indulge like I wasn't indulging previously. This weekend's campout made one thing absolutely clear. I cannot resist the food that is there. For breakfast today I had two bars that were bownies on the bottom and the chocolate covered rice crispies on the top with mashmellow in the middle. Clearly not a breakfast that is either good for me or one that is sustaining. I think though, that if I plan it out a bit better with food that I bring I can manage better. I may eat a bit more than I should, but at least it's food that I should be eating, not crap.

In all, I've maintained at least 22 pounds lost in the last couple of months. It's not the 25 I had at my lowest, but it's something. I just need to get back to figuring out what works for me and stick to it again.

I guess, now that I think about it, it's always going to be a struggle. Eating healthy and working out. But it's a struggle that I'm willing to go through and one that will get easier the longer I'm in it.