187.4: I Need to Practice Eating Out

This past weekend was Pete's Birthday.  And honestly I thought it was his 45th, when really it was his 46th.  Crap he's old...I mean, I love my husband.

We had a low key Saturday which was his birthday.  He wasn't feeling the best and my ear was still plugged and I walked sideways from lack of balance.

Sunday I went to the gym (shhh, I have a streak going, but let's ignore it, so I don't stop...).  I came home, had breakfast, jumped in the shower and we were off.  We picked up my 10 year old niece, who is a hoot.  She talks...C.O.N.S.T.A.N.T.L.Y. about stuff and makes Pete and I laugh out loud.  We went to the Mall of America, which appears to be the only mall that Pete can shop at (he doesn't like the other ones...or shopping in general).  We did our errands, shopped, window shopped mostly and had some gelato. 

For dinner, we met my family at Texas Roadhouse.  MMMMM, honey buns.  This time I was determined to eat clean-er, eat less and be aware of how I was eating and my body.  So we sat at the table and waited for the rest of the family to arrive.  Everyone was eating the rolls and I took mine.  I took small bites and talked while I ate so I wasn't eating fast.  But by the time that the majority of the roll was eaten, I realized that it wasn't going to go down.

Shit.  Not again.  Not again at a restaurant with my Mom watching me with her eagle eye.  So I sat.  Then I tried sipping some of my niece's diet coke to help dissolve it.  But it must be the combination of the carbonation and the sugar, because it didn't help that much.

So I picked at my food and tried to move it around so that no one would notice that I wasn't eating.  As everyone else was finishing and I was realizing that we'd need a to go box...it suddenly slipped down.  Instant relief.  It wasn't super painful like the last couple of times, it was just uncomfortable.  So I ate a bit of my plain sweet potato and a few mushrooms.  I boxed up my 3 ounces of meat and the rest of the potato and mushrooms for my lunch the next day.

What I realized is that I need to practice eating out.  This is a process and I need to be allowing myself time to learn it.  I need to be aware of what I'm eating and how I'm eating it.  Talking while eating is good because it slows you down.  BUT talking while eating can be bed because you don't realize what your eating and how.  I also need to make good choices.  Chewy bread that can mush up and get stuck, isn't a good choice. 

I'll get this.  I know I will.