191.0; My Goal(s)

Man I hate to say this, but at the same time I need to say it.

Goals.  I need more of them.  Nothing like the impending end of the year to think about goal setting, right?  I mean New Year Resolutions, 2013 Goals, Where Do You Want to Be in 5 Years?  Goals.  To be honest, until I started thinking about losing weight, I never really set formal goals.  That's not to say that I didn't think about where I wanted to be in life.  But I never sat and really wrote them down or told anyone.  Maybe this was the cause of my underachievement?

Pete and I had a discussion over the weekend.  About goals and trying new things and doing new things.  What it came down to for me, is that before him, no one ever encouraged me and I didn't have enough self confidence to try on my own.  My prior roommate did some pushing and encouraging, but I don't know that she did it for the right reasons.

So when I start to think about coming close to my 100 pounds lost...or my 53 pounds in a year...or my muscle definition, I get kind of teary.  Those are big accomplishments and big goals to reach.  Part of me wants to sit in the glory of those goals and live them and bask in the recognition of them.  You know, all safe.  The other part of me wants to really think about what else I can accomplish.  What can I really do if I put my mind to it?

Today I'm 191 pounds.  I've been steadily losing since my last fill in November.  I told Pete this weekend that I'm hoping to be out of the 190's by 1/1/13.  I have been mostly controlling eating and working out less.  I think I can do it.  I know that if I started exercising (damn migraine and exhaustion lately) I could be under 190 easily.  But I also need to know that if I push with unrealistic plans (going to the gym daily, eating only clean foods over the holiday...) I will burn myself out.  I don't need to do that during and already stressful time.

So my goal:  by 1/1/13 be 189 or under.

My 2013 goals?  I'm not sure yet.  I'm about 15 pounds from my goal weight.  I want to run 10K outside without stopping.  I need to get back to regular weekly strength training.  I need to eat better to feel better.  I need to think of some yearly goals for 2013 now that I've found my power.