I'm mad at my body. I'm mad at it for teasing me with little things here and there and then taking it away. I'm mad that it can't just continue in a nice downward trend. I'm mad that I can't seem to get a handle on my body. I'm mad that it fluctuates so much. I'm mad that I...
Really I'm mad at myself. My whole self. I know what I need to do to lose weight and I know that it's not a quick process. And even more so I don't want it to be a quick progress. I know that I will get to where I want to be, but I have to submit to what I need to do.
The reality is that it's so hard to keep up new things. I know that I need to exercise 60 minutes at least 5 times a week. I know that I need to eat small/sensible meals. I know that life does not exist on cake and crap. I know this. My brain knows this. My body has a hard time complying sometimes. It's life. It's bound to happen.
What I need to do is start getting to sleep at a more decent time than 11:30 and getting all night sleep instead of broken crappy sleep. I know that I need to get my ASS out of bed, no matter how tired I am and re-establish that pattern of regular exercise. I know that I need to quit eating everything in sight.
I know these things. All of them. Now I need to put them into practice. And I need to forgive myself for the things that I do and realize they are normal and part of the process.