Really the title says it all. I've developed Pete's syndrome of being cold ALL.THE.TIME. Friday I didn't want to get out of bed, but I did. I spent the day off running errand after errand. When I got home I jumped back in bed and turned that heated blanket on high. I had a hard time again getting out of bed to get ready for date night. Then I again followed Pete and took a HOT shower for about 15 minutes, with the door closed, to get warm. Today, I have a sweater on and my office heater. Plus hot coffee and anything else I can think of.
Want to know the worst part of all this? I'm cold all day and evening. Multiple heated blankets and everything to get warn. When I lay down to try and actually sleep, I am HOT AS HELL. Damn perimenopause. I sleep most of the night with very little covers while Pete is holed up under 12 layers like an Eskimo. I knew that I'd get cold when I lost weight. But I thought that my hot flashes would counteract this and I'd be ok in the middle. No such luck.
I c-hosted a baby shower this weekend. Got some wonderful baby snuggles in and I am satisfied until I can snuggle again at Thanksgiving. I saw family that I really haven't seen since May. I do have to mention that I was rocking my new-to-me Silver jeans ($25 at Clothes Mentor than-you-very-much), a new black belt, a White long sleeve shirt (medium - YES!) and I black vest (medium again - YES!) with a cute scarf and tall black heels. I felt AWESOME and for the first time I think EVER in fashion and at a size that I feel ok about. I got comments about how great I looked from lots of family. It felt good.
But. And you knew there was a but in there somewhere, right? At one point my aunt took me aside and told me how good I look. When I told her that I was down 90+ pounds from my heaviest she congratulated me. Then I told her that I'm about 20 pounds from my goal. She told me not to lose anymore weight. I inwardly sighed and immediately heard my voice in my head telling Pete something similar. I now understand his frustration with everyone telling him not to lose anymore weight, somewhat.
My goal has always get to 175 and see where I look. Maybe I'll get there and think that I look great and try to maintain. Maybe I'll think that it's too much and gain some back. And maybe, just maybe, I'll decide that I want to lose more. Who knows. But I haven't wavered from that goal this whole time. And yet, to others I look "ok" right now. I understand now that my goal is what it is. And no matter what people say at this point, I'm going to keep working towards the goal. When I get to that goal I'm going to 1. Assess my body shape. 2. Talk with my primary care doctor and my bariatric doctor about how I look and my BMI, fat percentage and muscle percentage. 3. I'm going to listen to those around me and see what they have to say about how I look. Then I 'll decide where to go from there.