Honesty

When I went to the Prior Fat Girl's get together in the fall, I asked questions.  I asked a few different questions to a few different presenters.  Then I asked Jen a question.  And it's been kind of haunting me all this time.

I asked her what prompted her to be so honest about her journey.  She was gracious and replied that it was hard, but that she did it hoping to help herself and others.

I've had several months to think about this.  The more I think about it the more stupid I think the question is.  Yes, I know there are no stupid questions, but this one is.  Hear me out? 

If I'm not willing to be honest with myself, first of all, I'm never going to succeed in my journey.  If I can't be honest with myself at 40 years old, when will I get honest with myself?  Why am I not being honest with myself?

These are the qeustions that I've been pondering.  Then add to it questions like If I can't be honest with myself, how could I be honest with byu blog?  Or if I can't be honest with myself, why can I be honest in my blog with strangers?

I think I realize that I need to be honest with me.  Good, bad or otherwise, I need to be honest with me.  My journey in life, not just weight, will only be successful if I am honest with myself.
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And with that, I leave you with this:  I am back in the 230's as of this weekend.  My goal would be to be about 200 by the time riding season starts in May.  Totally attainable.