I think I figured it out. This out of sorts thing. Not the reason behind it, but rather how to cure it.
Actually now that I think about it, I may know the reason behind it and how to cure it.
I exhausted my vacation hours last year. I was down to less than 20 by the end of the wedding hoopla last fall. Between days off for illness, days off for wedding, days off for fun...I had not many days off left. We can carry over 240 hours at the end of each year. Pre-Pete (aka "when I had no life") Iused to carry over about 150 or so each year. My goal was and still is to get to the 240 hours one year so that I can carry it over, accumulate more during the year and take a month or so off in the summer. Dreams...
Back to the last year...I used a lot of hours. When it came time for the wedding I didn't even take a full week off. Because honestly, it freaks me out when I see that FTO balance drop below 100. Weird. I know. 100 hours is 2.5 weeks off. And I really only need 40 hours to get to my emergency leave should I need it. But when the balance goes below 100 I get a little anxious.
Because of my anxiety about this I've spent the last year really thinking about the time that I take off. I haven't taken more than 4 days off at a time. And for most days that I do take off, I end up working 4-10 hour days so that I don't have to take FTO hours.
To put it simply...I need a vacation.
I'd love to take a week and just do nothing. NO planning for motorcycle trips, no work, no housework, no places I have to be...well do al that and not feel guilty about not doing it also. But that's not going to happen. I have a week vacation planned later this month, but it's an actual trip with friends. So no mindless vegging about going on then.
My plan is to take a day off next week to veg. To lay about in bed and watch the reality shows that I have saved up on Tivo and that Pete hates. To read the magazines on the floor by my bed. To finsh the last Twilight book that I've been reading for several months. To crochet. To...uh...do nothing important all day long. I need to re-charge my mind, my soul, my emotions and my body.